The Snotling Destruction Derby, sponsored by Grintoof, has taken place in All-Star Week since Season III to give the heavy hitters of the league a chance to shine, since All-Star events are usually dominated by flair players.
Max Dryhauser Derby 2

Max Dryhauser smashes a Snotling in the Season III derby.

Along with the regular derby, a celebrity derby has been held each season, in which retired and inactive players from past seasons show off their blocking skills.

Season III Derby

Season IV Derby

Season V Derby


-Each team may send one representative to take part. The Derby occurs prior to the All-Star matches, so players may take part in both if necessary.

-Each team representative will be given 16 blocks. One other player will be allowed to take the pitch with the representative if special assistance is required (Bloodlust, Really Stupid). This person may not assist in blocking.

-One snotling will step into the target area to receive each block. A player may elect to have two snotlings step into the box if they wish to attempt a Multiple Block.

-If a snotling is knocked out of the target area, the blocking player may elect to pursue, without forfeiting any of their upcoming blocks (Frenzy). However, snotlings waiting to enter the target area may assist their comrade in this follow-up block. Pursue at your own risk.

-If a player is knocked down in the course of a block, they do not receive any further attempts, and their score for that round is tallied. Dropping to Pile On to an opponent is acceptable. But the player must stand up in order to block the next snotling (not a problem for most players, except possibly a Treeman with Piling On).

-One point is awarded for each casualty or K.O. Ties will go to the player with more casualties. Killing Grintoof snotlings is prohibited. Teams of players who kill Grintoof snotlings will be assessed a $20,000 fine for each snotling killed to provide for their replacement.

-Each representative will receive 16 block attempts in the 1st round. The top half scorers in the 1st round will advance to the 2nd round, where they will receive another 16 attempts. The top two scorers in the 2nd round will advance to the final, where they will receive 16 attemps. The highest scoring player in the final is the winner. The lowest scoring player in the 1st round is the biggest loser.

-Scores do not carry over from earlier rounds. Each round is a clean slate.

-No, you do not get to keep the SPP from smashing the Snotlings.


The winner will receive a pair of Grintoof Rogre hardliner gloves. These gloves may be used as a pre-game inducement to give that player +1 ST for an upcoming match. However, the gloves are cheaply-constructed, and will fall apart after two matches.

The biggest loser will receive a Grintoof Procreatis codpiece. As part of the attached endorsement deal, the player must wear the codpiece in his next three matches. For the first two, the codpiece grants +1 AV. But on the third match, it would seem he has placed too much faith in his cheap, snotling-produced Grintoof equipment. Proudly thrusting his crotch into the path of every incoming block, the codpiece fails, and he gets -1 AV for that third match, before tossing the thing.

Ad blocker interference detected!

Wikia is a free-to-use site that makes money from advertising. We have a modified experience for viewers using ad blockers

Wikia is not accessible if you’ve made further modifications. Remove the custom ad blocker rule(s) and the page will load as expected.